Sixteen-year-old physics nerd Aysel is obsessed with plotting her own death. With a mother who can barely look at her without wincing, classmates who whisper behind her back, and a father whose violent crime rocked her small town, Aysel is ready to turn her potential energy into nothingness.
There’s only one problem: she’s not sure she has the courage to do it alone. But once she discovers a website with a section called Suicide Partners, Aysel’s convinced she’s found her solution: a teen boy with the username FrozenRobot (aka Roman) who’s haunted by a family tragedy is looking for a partner.
Even though Aysel and Roman have nothing in common, they slowly start to fill in each other’s broken lives. But as their suicide pact becomes more concrete, Aysel begins to question whether she really wants to go through with it. Ultimately, she must choose between wanting to die or trying to convince Roman to live so they can discover the potential of their energy together. Except that Roman may not be so easy to convince.
I enjoyed this book more than I thought I would. It was a really great story about a much too often shied away from topic, suicide. Aysel, whose name I didn’t know how to say until she explained it to a classmate, is a teen who really needs help. And the reader just knows that there’s something not right with her right away. Even though her reasons for her depression and suicidal thoughts are somewhat understandable, you still are screaming at her to tell someone, tell her mom or teacher. I mean it is sooo sad!
Aysel’s father murdered a young man, who was like the hero of the town, and is now in jail. Her life is messed up because people still talk about it, even 3 years later. And since her last name is the same as his, people relate what happened to her and then automatically assume the worst about her. But really, I think it’s in her head. I think she relates what happened to herself and she thinks the worst of herself. Which only increases her depression and reasons to commit suicide.
When she meets Roman, it makes you cringe a little because you’re like, no, you don’t need to commit suicide- you need to talk to someone and get this whole, I’m like my father, idea out of your head.
In the end, she not only saves Roman from his attempt at suicide but she saves herself from the thoughts in her head. They get help and they fall in love with each other.
4 out of 5 stars. Great YA book